Part of National Down Syndrome Awareness Month is educating the public at large about what Ds is (or can be) with the idea in mind that “(We’re) More Alike Than Different”.

I find myself getting confused at times by how much of who Thorin is – is dictated by him having Down syndrome. I’m not really sure. To that end I have started to create a multiple-choice test. This is what I came up with so far.

When asked anything that remotely resembles trying to ascertain a mere nugget of concrete information about one’s day results in hands being firmly clamped over ears and the vigorous shaking of the head in the negative it can be attributed to:

1.   A response related to Down syndrome.

2.   Typical child behavior.

3.   You are a male.

Throwing your shoes in a public area (ex. Out the car window, at Target, Trader Joe’s, etc):

1.   A behavior related to Down syndrome.

2.   Typical child behavior.

3.   George W. Bush is within hitting distance.

Screaming at the top of your lungs – really anywhere:

1.   A behavior related to Down syndrome.

2.   Typical child behavior

3.   You know it bothers your mother.

Running away suddenly into the street, in a crowded parking lot, or a store (preferably with clothing racks you can hide in and remain quiet for a very long time):

1.   A behavior related to Down syndrome.

2.   Typical child behavior

3.   You know it scares the shit out of your mother.

Upon being asked to do anything (ex. put your pajamas on, go to the bathroom, put your dishes in the sink, pick up your toys, stop hitting Coco, etc) you fling yourself on the floor/bed/chair crying: 

1.   A behavior related to Down syndrome.

2.   Typical child behavior

3. You recently watched “Gone With The Wind”.

Repeating the same phrase over and over again for up to 5 or even 10 full minutes even though you received an answer the first time:

1.   A behavior related to Down syndrome.

2.   Typical child behavior

3.   You have been trained in CIA interrogation techniques.

Falling over on the ground and laying prostate (seemingly unable to move and amazingly unmovable):

1.   A behavior related to Down syndrome.

2.   Typical child behavior.

3.   You have just heard Mary Hart’s voice (from 1989).

Can remain unresponsive to being spoken to forever:

1.   A behavior related to Down syndrome.

2.   Typical child behavior.

3.   You are a Zen master training your mother in the art of patience.

Successfully for years you have try to disrupt mealtime by throwing a beverage. And – even when no one responds anymore because you have completely broken him or her from responding:

1.   A behavior related to Down syndrome.

2.   Typical child behavior.

3.   You find you just love throwing shit.

Others love you with a fierceness that seems unbelievably immense:

1.   You have Down syndrome.

2.   You are a typical child.

3.   You are Thorin.

4.   Insert your child’s name here.