A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the IEP*

Ward and I went to an IEP (Independent Education Plan) for Thorin this week.** A new goal for Thorin at his school is to decrease his antagonizing behaviors. I asked,  “What are those behaviors?” The teacher said, “Well, he taps kids on the shoulder over and over again and also nudges them in the ribs with his elbow.”  Without thinking I said, “Oh, I know where he learned that!”  Thank god I had the presence of mind not to say – in front of the various professionals present –  it was from me! He and I do that to each other all the time for laughs!

I told my sister and she said, “Kari! You have to stop doing that!” I said, “Can’t we keep doing it but when I do it I will say, “This means I like you” And, then maybe he will say that to the kid. That would build his verbal skills.” She said, “No, you can’t! The reason it’s antagonizing is the other kids don’t like it!” Kill joy.

I guess I have to tell the school. Ick. And, he and I have to stop doing that. Sad.

* formerly titled – “Reason 3,201 – Why I am a Bad Parent”. I changed it because I really think it’s a funny story and not a sad one.

**This story was the best part of what was otherwise a gut-wrenching meeting. IEPs really bite.

This entry was posted in Adopting, By Notatypicalmom, education, Parenting, Random life by Kari Wagner-Peck. Bookmark the permalink.

About Kari Wagner-Peck

Kari Wagner-Peck lives with her husband and son in Maine. She is a writer & storyteller who home schools with her son. She has a M.S.W. and has been at various times a practicing social worker, documentary videographer, film festival director and retail clerk. She is the author of Not Always Happy: An Unusual Parenting Journey, May, 2017, Central Recovery Press. She has been published at The New York Times Well Family blog, The Huffington Post, The The Good Men Project, The Sydney Morning Herald Daily Life blog, BLOOM and Love That Max among others. Author page: kariwagnerpeck.com Twitter @KariWagnerPeck and Facebook: www.facebook.com/NotAlwaysHappyLive/ Email: kariwagnerpeck@gmail.com

4 thoughts on “A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the IEP*

  1. This is a sad story! I get the gut wrenching. Reading JoJo’s quarterly report from the school was really hard for me. I want to hear everything’s perfect and easy and joyful! I don’t know if it’s the same thing for you.

    • Jeepers, I think my stuff is leaking out in this post unintentionally. I really meant that one to be funny because the sad part of the meeting was so much worse. Ward and I both felt like we had been in a washing machine for about 2 hours. We know T has delays. The hard part for us is we want everyone to bring their motherfucking A game to the table and keep the bar high.

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